Alhamdulillah, the results I received are the same as I was told by Azali. Though I’m not exactly ecstatic with my Land Law, I’m thankful nevertheless. It is definitely more than I could ask for. Thank you Allah.
I’m currently at home. All my siblings are home so it’s kind of chaotic because we all like to talk and “usik” and “kacau” each other. After tomorrow, I’ll be the only one home. Everyone’s going back to school, but I don’t have anything to do. I might go back to Shah Alam too.
This is just one of those times in life when I feel like I am so, so fat. Honestly. Some people will say I am “mengada” when I say I am fat, because for them, I am not. But still, every time I look at myself in the mirror, I see a person with huge hips, an expanding waistline, dangling arms and of course, my unmistakably “pipi besar”. It sucks you know, to fell so bad about my own physique when I know that there are a million other things that make me beautiful.
Have you ever felt that way before? Have you ever felt like your head were too big for your body, or that no matter how little you eat, you feel like you put on weight uncontrollably? And the fact that your pants are size M instead of S makes you depressed? Does the whole world really care about size, or am I the only one making such a big fuss out of this whole deal?
Really, I don’t get it. Despite the fact that there exist retails such as Ms. Read, Big Brown Bag and Fyi, it serves as of absolutely no condolence to me that there are bigger people than me. I am so ungrateful, don’t you think? I guess I’m so stressed out because my sister is so small. But she’s 12, so what do you expect. My waist hasn’t grown any bigger than the time I was 12, but still, she is so… “halus”. And I keep on comparing myself to my Mom. She is so freaking small for her age okay. Her clothes 5 years ago are all my size right now. And 5 years ago, she had 3 children already! Argh.
I’m sure this depression is making all of you depressed as well, but I guess I have the right to go all raving mad in my own little space. Nonetheless, I’m going to stop. Stop to think of what else I need to do to make me feel less fat than I am. Or should I start thinking that I’m not fat at all?
I need to go shopping. Please give me money. Lots of it.
I’m currently at home. All my siblings are home so it’s kind of chaotic because we all like to talk and “usik” and “kacau” each other. After tomorrow, I’ll be the only one home. Everyone’s going back to school, but I don’t have anything to do. I might go back to Shah Alam too.
This is just one of those times in life when I feel like I am so, so fat. Honestly. Some people will say I am “mengada” when I say I am fat, because for them, I am not. But still, every time I look at myself in the mirror, I see a person with huge hips, an expanding waistline, dangling arms and of course, my unmistakably “pipi besar”. It sucks you know, to fell so bad about my own physique when I know that there are a million other things that make me beautiful.
Have you ever felt that way before? Have you ever felt like your head were too big for your body, or that no matter how little you eat, you feel like you put on weight uncontrollably? And the fact that your pants are size M instead of S makes you depressed? Does the whole world really care about size, or am I the only one making such a big fuss out of this whole deal?
Really, I don’t get it. Despite the fact that there exist retails such as Ms. Read, Big Brown Bag and Fyi, it serves as of absolutely no condolence to me that there are bigger people than me. I am so ungrateful, don’t you think? I guess I’m so stressed out because my sister is so small. But she’s 12, so what do you expect. My waist hasn’t grown any bigger than the time I was 12, but still, she is so… “halus”. And I keep on comparing myself to my Mom. She is so freaking small for her age okay. Her clothes 5 years ago are all my size right now. And 5 years ago, she had 3 children already! Argh.
I’m sure this depression is making all of you depressed as well, but I guess I have the right to go all raving mad in my own little space. Nonetheless, I’m going to stop. Stop to think of what else I need to do to make me feel less fat than I am. Or should I start thinking that I’m not fat at all?
I need to go shopping. Please give me money. Lots of it.
2 comments:
Boy, trust me, I really do get how u feel.
But please do not end up like me.
I was bulimic before and it was not a pretty sight.
And am still struggling with issues until now.
And girl, I know I'm gonna sound like everybody, you're absolutely not fat.
Heee...sorry to bore u with my aunt naggie advice.
Please love ur body. =)
love,
melissa.
thank you aunt agony =)
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